Chemical

The results are (finally) all in:

7/1: hCG 30
7/5: 59
7/7: 64
7/11: 9

It's officially a chemical pregnancy. We are very sad, especially after being so surprised to get a positive in the first place. I keep telling people I was prepared to find out the FET didn't work at all, but I wasn't prepared to find out it did work, then maybe, then maybe not, then definitely not. It's been a very long ten days being in limbo, not knowing what will happen. In a way it's a relief not to have to wonder anymore, even though the news isn't good.

Thanks to all of you for your supportive words and prayers - we have needed them all and they have helped! We plan to move on to a fresh cycle soon.

Positive.....?

Yesterday was the big day - my quantitative hCG blood test. It was also the final day of Young Women camp, where I spent the past week as a level leader. (SO much fun, and so exhausting!) While at camp I tested with HPTs daily and on Wednesday, 7 days past our 5 day transfer (7dp5dt for those in the online infertile world) I got the faintest second line I've ever seen. In fact, I didn't quite believe that it was actually there, it was that light. The lighting in the camp bathrooms - and I'm using the word "bathrooms" here very loosely - was so dim that I had to take the tests outside into the sunlight to read them, which was somewhat comical since I didn't want anyone to know what I was doing, so I had to try to hide them behind my hand while also letting enough sunlight in to read the result. I texted E about that second line but didn't tell anyone else because it was so light I didn't really believe it yet. Thursday (8dp5dt) I tested again, and the line was still faint, but definitely there. I told my camp partner and sent out a few text messages.

Friday morning I had planned to go straight to LabCorp after packing up at camp, hoping I would get there early enough to get my results the same day. My sweet level leader partner Lezlie convinced me to leave early to make sure I wouldn't have to wait all weekend. Because of the 4th of July I would have had to wait until Tuesday, which was unfathomably long. I made it out by 7:40 and didn't get to LabCorp until 8:30 because my GPS kept telling me to turn onto streets that didn't exist (iPhone navigation finally came to the rescue.) I still thought that would be plenty of time. Once I got home, I took a shower, changed my clothes and waited by the phone. And waited. And waited. Finally at 4:30 I called the clinic, where I was very surprised to hear that they had not received my results, that they don't usually put STAT on the hCG lab orders (WHAT?!) and it was normal for them not to get results from LabCorp until 8 or 9 pm, long after the center closes. I just about lost it at this point, after having gone to so much trouble to get to LabCorp early enough in the day, only to have to wait over a 3 day weekend to get results. The receptionist I was talking to has never been exactly compassionate when I've had problems before (just her personality I think) but she seemed to feel sorry for me and promised to leave a note for Lan to call me first thing in the morning, since she was coming in for a transfer. I know I'm hormonal, and exhausted from camp, and a hundred other things, but REALLY? Is it that unreasonable to get hCG results the same day? I have NEVER heard of another center making patients wait overnight or longer to get results. This alone is enough to make me consider going with another clinic if we do this again.

Anyway...the call finally came this morning, and it was worth the wait - I got to hear the words "You're pregnant!" So wonderful to hear. The next bit was not as wonderful. My hCG is only 30. Within the normal range for 9dp5dt, but on the low side. The next test on Tuesday will give us a much better idea of whether this pregnancy is viable. And now you know why I'm postdating this entry. I'm not ready to put the news out there until we know things are developing normally.

Three Little Embryos

"Three little embryos"... kind of sounds like the start of a very modern fairy tale or nursery rhyme (have you ever noticed that in fairy tales things come in threes? Three bears, three little pigs, three brothers.)

We had our embryo transfer today and I now have three little embryos in my belly. They were thawed early in the morning and all three survived. Dr. A said they were "fair" in quality, a bit more tactful than "not so pretty." E and I dropped Sawyer off at his cousins' house, I took my valium (which made me completely loopy and weird) and drank my water, and we arrived to our appointment right on time. We had to wait for about half an hour because there was another transfer right before ours.

In the waiting room I quickly discovered that I had consumed way too much water beforehand. The instruction sheet said to drink 8 oz one hour before my appointment, because a full bladder helps them visualize the uterus with an abdominal ultrasound. I drank 40 oz, because during my mock transfer I drank 8 and it wasn't nearly enough. Nurse L had to keep bringing me water, and the final amount was 32 oz. So I figured 40 would be plenty. And wow, it definitely was. I was in so much pain I had to pee in small amounts FOUR times beforehand to relieve some pressure. Because water was constantly filtering in, I was still in a lot of pain during the transfer, with the speculum in and the transducer pushing on my belly. OW. Afterwards they want you to lie flat with the stretcher tilted so your feet are higher than your head for 30 minutes. After 10 I knew I wasn't going to make it. Nurse A asked if I wanted a bedpan and I gratefully said yes. Normally I would have been so embarrassed but it was so painful at that point I didn't care (the valium probably helped too.)

The transfer itself was very smooth. First they got me set up on the table and had us verify our names and birth dates with the embryologist to make sure we were matched up to the right straw. Then Dr. A put the speculum in me and cleansed the cervical area to make sure nothing harmful would be introduced with the catheter. At the same time Nurse A worked the ultrasound to get a good view of where everything was going to go. When it was time for the embryos they dimmed the lights (bright light can be harmful to them) and the embryologist brought in the straw (kind of like a catheter) that held our embryos. Dr A very slowly threaded the catheter through my cervix and up to the top of my uterus. The embryos are suspended in a liquid solution with a tiny air bubble next to them so that on the ultrasound the doctor can see where they land - the embryos themselves are too small at this point to be seen with the naked eye. They went right where they were supposed to. I wasn't able to fully appreciate the moment because of other urgent needs but it is an amazing process. We got a picture of the little guys/gals, which I'll post once I get a chance to scan it.

And now, we wait. I'm on two days of bedrest (only getting up to use the bathroom, although I admit I haven't been that strict about it). My parents and baby sister are in town so my mom and Tanne are coming over tomorrow to entertain me, which I'm very excited about. We have a busy weekend spending time with my family, and on Monday I leave for Young Women camp for five days. I think this two week wait is going to fly by.

Not So Pretty

Yesterday I had an appointment to make sure the birth control pills are suppressing my ovaries. Lan (the coordinating nurse) was out of town so they were running late and we had to sit there waiting for over an hour. I didn't think I was going to make it back home in time to get Sawyer off the bus. This is where living an hour away from the center can be problematic. Finally Dr. A was ready to see us, and everything looked good. I'm suppressed (in more ways than one now, haha) and the cyst is shrinking. The hormones are doing their job, beyond just making me really really cranky! I got the go ahead to start Lupron, 20 units a day.

Eric came with me to the appointment because we also had to sign our consent forms. The forms give basic medical information about the various procedures and their risks, as well as the risks of pregnancy. You sign off on those, I guess so you can't later sue the center if things go wrong. Then you have to decide what will happen to any leftover embryos. Since we only have 3 it's not likely that we'll have any left, but we're thinking ahead to fresh cycles in the future where that is a possibility. They take you through every possible scenario - for instance, if your husband dies, what do you want to do with the embryos? If you die but your husband's still alive? What if you both die? Or what if you get divorced? Yeah, all really fun to think about. For each scenario there are several options - donate to another couple, donate to research, store indefinitely, or discard. So we made all those decisions and signed off on them with the notary, Carol at the front desk - who by the way is hilarious. (Our decisions: If I die, discard; if Eric dies, discard; if we both die, donate to another couple; divorce, discard. I would rather donate to research, but Eric is not comfortable with that.)

Then we discussed our embryos and how many we should transfer. This part was pretty discouraging, because after reviewing the images taken 7 years ago, Dr. A said "They are...not so pretty...no offense." (To which I wanted to respond, "Hey buddy, tell YOUR embryos to look in a mirror sometime!") Last time we did IVF we used the best 2 embryos to transfer, which was obviously a good choice because it got us Sawyer. Unfortunately the ones we left behind are much lower quality, and will likely be even worse after thawing (the thawing process can sometimes damage embryos; interestingly, the amount of time they have been frozen is irrelevant.) Two are blastocycts, but not expanded, and one is a morula, which is not great at all.

We are doing assisted hatching, which could help, and the fact that we've had a positive result in the past works in our favor. But still, Dr. A gives us about a 20% chance with these embryos and told us to be prepared for a negative result. Which is kind of funny, because that's already the way I've been feeling about this cycle. I'm prepared for it not to work. But we are still going to give it our all, because we both feel strongly about giving these embryos a chance. As far as how many, we decided to go ahead and transfer all three - since they are lower quality the chances of all three implanting are "zero to minuscule...it would be an absolute miracle." So I feel good about that.

I also asked how likely it is that things will go according to schedule and he said "Extremely likely...98% chance." REs are really good at speaking in percentages.  So I need to reschedule Sawyer's opthamologist appointment that's the same day as embryo transfer.

Next step: I stop birth control pills on Tuesday, go in for another ultrasound on Friday and start Estrace that day if everything looks good.

I'm Only In It For The Drugs

I'm on a lot of medications right now. Like, a LOT. Here's the list (full disclosure: I have to look at my list on my iPhone to remember them all.)

-levothyroxine (for hypothyroid)
-metformin (for PCOS)
-bromocriptine (for elevated prolactin, probably also related to PCOS)
-birth control pills (part of FET cycle)
-prenatal vitamins (doesn't hurt to be prepared)
-vitamin D (because I am always pasty white)
-baby aspirin (increase blood flow to uterus)
-Lovenox (to prevent blood clots, since I am "blessed" with Factor V Leiden and MTHFR.)

The last one is what is causing all the trouble, and not just because it stings like a mofo. My insurance doesn't seem to want to cover it. At first they would let my pharmacy fill it, but only 6 syringes at a time. With a $10 copay, that's actually pretty reasonable compared to the out of pocket price (at least ten times that amount, even for the generic, which explains their reluctance to pay for it.) It was just kind of a bother to make such frequent trips to Target. Then last time when I tried to fill it I got rejected - they now will only give me 6 syringes every 23 days. Which is pretty useless since I need to take it daily or I could, you know, die from a pulmonary embolism. (Also, 23 days? Why not 20? Or 30? Or 42? Who came up with 23?) I've talked to several customer service reps who have been about as useless as their current Lovenox policy. It's supposed to be a straightforward process: have my doctor call them and tell them I need to take it every day, but that's happened twice already and for some reason that hasn't been enough to change it. Thankfully my hematologist had some samples in the office and she let me have enough to cover me for the next few days while we battle things out.

Watch out Cigna. I'm willing to fight for a long time to earn the privilege of not dying of a blood clot.

Scheduled

Big news today - well, not Osama Bin Laden-big, but infertility saga big. I'm scheduled! All the preliminary testing is done and we are officially cycling, gearing up for the big FET.

Here's the rundown, for anyone interested in such things (and for my future reference - I can't even count the number of times I've gone back to posts about our first IVF to remind myself of what happened.)

5/9 - Baseline sonogram & bloodwork. Begin birth control pills and Lovenox injections*. (Done.) The sonogram didn't go quite as expected since we found that I have a large ovarian cyst, but the bcps should shrink it down. We hope.

5/27 - Sonogram. Begin taking Lupron, 20 units a day (sub-q injections.)

5/30 - last birth control pill

6/3 - Sonogram & bloodwork. Begin Estrace (not sure yet if it will be in pill or suppository form,  but the important thing is it's NOT an injection!) Reduce Lupron to 10 units a day.

6/7 - Start doxycycline (antibiotic) 100 mg, 2x day for 15 days. Eric takes it for 10 days.

6/10 - Sonogram & bloodwork. 

6/16 - Sonogram & bloodwork.

6/17 - Begin progesterone. Suppositories, not PIO injections. Hallelujah! With Sawyer I did PIO shots for something like 16 weeks, and I had nerve pain in my butt for a good two years after. I hear the suppositories are messy, but hey, I'm a mom, I can deal with messy.

6/22 - Embryo transfer.

7/1 - Beta test.

The last half of the schedule is extremely tentative and there's almost no chance everything will actually occur on those days, since it all depends on my body's reaction to the drugs. And if there's anything we know by now, it's that my body is unpredictable these days.

I've been on the phone all day scheduling appointments and ordering medications - from two different mail-order pharmacies, since apparently Village is out of Lupron. It was pretty funny talking to the lady at Freedom Drug, which we used for our last IVF in 2004. When she verified my address the one she had was 3 moves ago. It's funny how many things change if you just wait 7 years.



*I've been doing the Lovenox injections for 5 days and I'm already running out of non-bruised skin on my belly. And it really hurts, every time. How did I do this for nine months?

Stats

Invasive fertility tests: 6 (HSG, SHG, hysteroscopy, endometrial biopsy, mock embryo transfer, pituitary MRI)

New things we've found wrong with me from said tests: 5 (high prolactin, high TSH, blocked fallopian tube, endometritis, PCOS)

Blood draws done in the past 2 weeks: 6

Blood draws where they had to stick me more than once: 3 (on one occasion it took 4 pokes. Nice going, LabCorp.)

Medications I'm taking daily: 7 (surely this is excessive, especially since I haven't even started cycling yet.)

Voicemails left for my coordinating nurse: haven't even tried to count.

My ability to focus on anything other than this FET cycle: negligible.

One Down

HSG=DONE.

Thank goodness. I was so nervous going into it because last time I had one (almost 7 years ago) it was very painful. Hollering obscenities painful. The main purpose of an HSG is to find out if the fallopian tubes are open and basically in working condition. They inject dye into the uterus and through the tubes while they watch on an x-ray machine. If a tube is not open it can be pretty painful as the dye tries to get through, and that's what happened to me last time. I ended up having a diagnostic laparoscopy to investigate the non-cooperating tube and they found that the tube was fine, but I had stage 1 endometriosis.

I was sweating the whole drive to the clinic yesterday. I decided not to have Eric come with me because I realized he wouldn't even be allowed in the room during the procedure anyway (since they use x-rays they limit who can be in there), and it was getting complicated figuring out how to get Sawyer off the bus and not interrupt his schedule too much. So E stayed home to get Sawyer, which simplified things and turned out to be just fine. I told Dr. A how nervous I was and he promised me he would go very slowly to minimize the cramping. I also took 800 mg of Advil an hour before the best and popped 1/2 a hydrocodone tablet, which really helped with the anxiety and probably the pain too.

The test went great. It did hurt, but it was totally manageable and I didn't swear at the nurse. The results were the same as before, one tube didn't open, but Dr. A feels that we're OK to proceed with the FET since there doesn't seem to be any swelling or fluid buildup. (If you're like me and you wonder why the tubes matter for IVF/FET - which bypasses the egg traveling from the ovaries - here's a good explanation.)

I also had a brief consult with Dr. A to talk about my recent bloodwork. My TSH (thyroid) levels are higher than they like to see - below 2.7, and mine is at a 3.02. Not a level where most doctors will treat you, but too high for fertility cycling. My prolactin levels have also been consistently high, which is concerning, so I have to schedule an MRI to make sure I don't have a tumor on my pituitary gland. From what I've been reading online, hypothyroid and elevated prolactin can sometimes be related, so that would make sense. It also explains why my periods have been completely wacky the past few months. I've been on levothyroxine for the thyroid for about a week and I'll probably start on meds for the prolactin soon once we rule out a tumor.

All of this is throwing me for a loop since last time we did IVF my tests were all completely normal (aside from the mild endo.) Now it seems like we keep finding things. I'm trying to take it all one step at a time. On to the next test.

Waiting

There are lots of things about infertility that are hard. Invasive testing, surgeries, needles, mood swings, being on a constantly moving emotional roller coaster, the list goes on. Someone asked me the other day what the hardest part is. I answered without hesitation: WAITING.

Every step along the way of an IVF cycle involves waiting, which can literally add up to months, even years. You wait for your initial appointment. You wait for your period to start. You wait for test results, then wait to schedule yet another test. You wait for your estrogen to go up, or your lining to thicken, or your estrogen to go down. You wait, yet again, for the nurse to call you back (this is what I'm waiting for today.) And the biggest wait of all, where after all the testing and procedures you wait on pins and needles to find out if it all worked or if you get to start the waiting process all over again. 

This cycle has had even more waiting than normal because for the first time EVER since hitting puberty, my period was late. Ten days late. They put me on provera to get things going, which worked much more quickly than it was supposed to, which means it's anyone's guess how long it will last and if I can go through the testing I've scheduled (period has to end before the tests.) Speaking of which, here are the dates for those tests. Very tentative at this point because of my screwed-up cycle.

3/31 - HSG (SO nervous about this one, and I really wish Eric could come with me. Still trying to work that out.)

4/5 - mock embryo transfer

4/6 - SHG

4/7 - hysteroscopy and endometrial biopsy

If all goes well we're looking at a transfer date somewhere from mid-May to early June. 

If I can wait that long.

Obligatory Catch-Up Post

In 2010...

Sawyer turned 5 years old, and is attending the special education preschool program again with his beloved teacher Ms. Brenda. We're trying to get him as ready as possible for kindergarten in the fall, and at this point it's looking like he'll do well in a mainstreamed class. It's amazing how much he has improved. Still no diagnosis but we're working on it along with his teachers and developmental pediatrician.

I planted more tulips. I will not rest until every inch of flower bed is full of tulips!

We finally replaced the dirty white carpet in our family room with hardwood - so much easier to keep clean!

We had lots of playdates with cousins Caroline and Mary Grace, always Sawyer's most favorite friends.

I went to Girls Camp as a stake level leader, and it was the highlight of my summer. I'm now working with the young women at church, and I get to be a level leader again this summer - yay!

The other highlight of my summer was spending two whole weeks at the Outer Banks with my family. Relaxing, refreshing, rejuvenating...take your pick. Eric even came for about 5 days.

Penny picked up a bad case of scabies at the boarding kennel while we were gone. It took us 3 vet visits to finally figure out why she was so itchy all the time. Poor doggie in the Cone of Shame.

In September we adopted another rescue dog, Duncan. He's a 1 year old Golden Retriever and loves every human being in the world like crazy. We love him too, even though my vacuuming has tripled since we brought his furry butt home.

Sawyer had a blast being Buzz Lightyear for Halloween. He was a big hit at the town parade - even though he wasn't actually in it. Kids from the floats kept yelling "Hey! I see Buzz Lightyear!"

We attended the Rally to Restore Sanity on October 30. Sawyer loved it, especially when we had to force our way onto a packed Metro car to get there. He kept telling everyone we saw "I'm going to a rally!"

I completed the Couch to 5k program in preparation to run my first 5k (the "Freeze Your Gizzard" in Leesburg) but unfortunately got injured the week before the race (not from running - from Duncan running into my shin! No break, just a bone bruise but the doctor was scared about blood clots.) I'll do another one someday. 

Maybe.

In December Sawyer lost his first tooth. He didn't even tell us it was loose, I just went to put him in the bath and noticed that it was missing. We found it on the kitchen floor.

We stayed in Virginia for the holidays this year. For Thanksgiving we had dinner with Robbie, Michael, Erin, and her friend Avery, and a fun brunch at Megan and Ryan's the next day. We spent Christmas Eve attending church with Megan, Ryan and their kids and had dinner at their home (where Sawyer lost his second tooth - Santa and the Tooth Fairy came the same night!)

We took Sawyer to his first Kennedy Center performance - The Nutcracker. He loved it and, to our great surprise, sat still through the whole thing.

After Christmas we flew to Utah to see my little sister Tori get married to Billy Strong during one of the biggest snowstorms of the year. It was wonderful to be there for their special day as well as to spend time with my mom. Another shining moment was spending New Year's Eve in a sports bar called Wing Nutz trying desperately not to laugh as a group of very white Provo rappers "performed" a few feet away from us.

Concerts! I got a few good ones in this year - Ray Lamontagne and David Gray at Merriweather Post Pavilion in August, The Weepies at State Theater in November, Joshua Radin at the 9:30 Club February 15, and David Gray again just last week at the Music Center at Strathmore in Bethesda. The last one was quite possibly the pinnacle of my entire concert-going career - front row, dead center, acoustic tour. Perfection.

Anyone still out there?

Wow, 11 months. That's even longer than I thought.

You can probably guess what brings me back - the same reason that starting me blogging in the first place: We're getting ready to embark on more Adventures in Infertility.

Last time on A.I.I.... Three years ago we visited our R.E. to plan the transfer of our remaining 3 frozen blastocysts (embryos). All systems were go...and then we discovered that our insurance wasn't going to cover a single cent of it. So we decided to save up some more money and wait a while longer.  In the meantime we discovered Sawyer's developmental delays, moved and bought a house, and Eric changed jobs several times.

Finally, we seem to have reached an equilibrium. We're settled into our new home, Sawyer is doing great, and we have enough money in the bank to proceed. The time is right. AND joy of joys, it looks like our insurance is actually going to be very helpful this time around (if our paperwork is correct, everything should be covered at 90%.)

I had a consult with Dr. A on February 21 and we have a game plan. Since it's been so long since our last IVF, I need to undergo all the screening tests again. That will include:

-Baseline transvaginal ultrasound
-Preconception bloodwork/female infectious disease panel (more bloodwork)
-HSG X-ray (this was the really painful one for me last time; this time I will be armed with narcotics)
-SHG/pelvic exam
-Hysteroscopy and endometrial biopsy (another ouchie)
-Mock embryo transfer

If all goes well with the testing, transfer should be sometime around mid-April. 

As soon as my next cycle begins I can schedule the tests and get the ball rolling. It feels slightly terrifying to be plunging into all this again, even more so than the first time, because now I know what it entails. Sometimes ignorance really is bliss. But I feel ready, definitely more ready than I ever have been before. Probes, shots, stress, hormones, headaches, hope. Bring it on!

Chocolate Milk

Sawyer's favorite food is chocolate milk. He will drink it all day, every day if we let him. I buy the Nesquik powder so we can use organic milk to mix it into, and because it has less sugar than Hershey's syrup or Ovaltine (and did you know Hershey's is mostly high fructose corn syrup? Yuck.) I also like the powder rather than the premixed stuff because I can put just a little of it into his cup and his "chocolate milk" is more like regular milk with just a smidgen of chocolate.

The other day before dinner I asked him what he wanted to drink and of course he asked for chocolate milk. When I went into the kitchen he followed me saying "No no no no Mama! I want Daddy to make it!" I told him it was the same thing, Mama could make it just as well as Daddy. He insisted: he only wanted chocolate milk made by Daddy. So I watched Eric make it. It turns out Daddy has a different strategy - he adds 3 scoops of powder (the box says to use 2) and sometimes also adds a bit of half and half.

So it's true. Daddy really does make better chocolate milk. But Mama's might be less likely to give you type 2 diabetes.

Budding Artist

Sawyer has become obsessed with writing and drawing lately, which I'm thrilled about, because until very recently he had absolutely no interest in picking up a writing instrument of any kind. Now he'll sit at the table for long periods of time tracing letters and numbers and shapes, and getting more creative too. Here's his first recognizable drawing: "a face with arms."

Often he asks me to draw something for him so he can try to copy it. It's challenging for me since I'm not an artist (AT ALL). I do OK when he asks for a puppy, or a tree, or even Lightning McQueen. But yesterday he came up with a new one: "Mama, draw windy." So I drew a tree with lines going by to signify wind. Then he said, "Draw germs." Um...germs just look like little bugs, right? So I drew something resembling little spiders. Then, "Draw penguin germs." Sorry son. I can't draw that without doing some research. How about a smiley face instead?

OK, That's Enough

A New Year, and a New Layout

In lieu of making New Year's resolutions, I decided to do a blog makeover. I'm still tweaking some things, so if you come by during the next few days and things are a bit wonky, that's why. (Don't you just love the word "wonky"? Maybe I should resolve to say "wonky" more often.)


***Thanks to André for informing me that the comment form wasn't working - I think it's back up now. Also, I seem to have lost some of my blog roll in the left sidebar, so if you don't see your blog there (and you'd like it to be there) please let me know.

More Sawyerisms

Sawyer weighs 34 lbs now, just over the 30 lbs required to sit in a booster seat in the car. Although our car seat can handle up to 65 lbs, we've recently had several incidents where Eric took the car seat to work by accident, or the car seat cover was being washed of pee and Chick-Fil-A milkshake spills and I needed to go somewhere, so we finally went and bought a booster seat. I asked Sawyer if he was ready to ride in a booster seat like a big boy. He looked at me excitedly. "A monster seat?!" From "monster seat" we got to "mooster seat" and finally to "booster seat." But once in a while he still only hears the "-ster" part and calls it a monster seat. I like it.

Last night I heard Sawyer talking in his sleep. Just one loud exclamation: "I like pizza!" I do too son. I do too.

Merry Christmas!

We've had a wonderful Christmas in our new home. I was neglectful today and didn't take enough pictures as we opened gifts and visited with family - a sign that I was really enjoying myself. If I remember to get the camera out, it usually means I'm bored. But I did take a lot of pictures of our decorations a few days ago, aren't you excited? Here's our tree in the day...


....and at night.
and closer up.

And the tree in our front room. We bought this artificial tree a few years back, but every year I can't resist buying a real one, so we end up with two trees.

Stockings hung by the chimney, and a sleepy dog in the corner.

The entry.


Sawyer was so excited this morning to find a basketball hoop from Grandma and Grandpa Watts.
He shoots...
and he scores!

We opened gifts (Eric: Battlestar Gallactica Blu-ray box set, Wii console; Me: food processor, Wii Fit; Sawyer: board games, V-Tech laptop, fort building set from Grandma Toone, books from SueSue and Granddad) and around 11:30 Erin, Robbie, Megan, Ryan, Caroline and Mary Grace came over. We had brunch together (egg casserole, cheese grits and monkey muffins) and then exchanged MORE presents. We were sad my grandfather couldn't make it - he had planned on coming but wasn't feeling well. After all the gift giving and visiting we were all tired so we put on a movie for Sawyer and Caroline upstairs and the grownups watched Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince. I say "watched", but really everyone but Eric and me fell asleep within the first 20 minutes. I got a cute shot of Ryan and MG:
Even Penny joined in on the napping. Once I took off her Christmas pajamas, that is. She was too humiliated to sleep while she had them on.

Pretty soon it was time for dinner.


We had standing rib roast with port gravy, garlic mashed potatoes, haricots verts, homemade rolls with creamed honey, and cranberry apple Jello salad. Dessert was my dad's famous ice cream pie (Ben and Jerry's New York Super Fudge Chunk ice cream smooshed into premade Oreo cookie crusts.) I meant to get a picture of all of us eating, but of course I forgot. But I think everyone enjoyed it, and we had a great time chatting and being together. I'm so glad we had family members close this year and we could spend time with them, especially Robbie who came all the way from Miami. We missed my parents and Tori and Tanne a lot, and Eric's family too - it's always hard that we can't see everyone every year.

The past year has brought lots of changes for our little family, and many new opportunities. Tonight I'm feeling very grateful for all I have - especially the people I love the most. Merry Christmas everyone!