The things I'd never say

Michelle did a post about the things you've never said but would like to given the chance. Very thought-provoking. I'm fairly introverted and I tend to let a lot of things go unsaid, but in thinking about this post I realized that when it comes to the really important things, I do say them wherever it's possible. So most of mine are to people I'm not in contact with anymore. The following are things that I either haven't had the opportunity to say, or that I never would even if I could. Each one is to someone different. Feel free to guess. :)

1) Remember that time at Andrea's when we all fell asleep on the floor in front of the fire, and you ran your fingers through my hair and stroked my face? I was awake.

2) The letter you wrote me after my mission saved me in more ways than one. Thank you.

3) I still can't believe you started out our second date by asking me if I was wearing garments.

4) You are the main reason I believe in fate. I used to think (and hope) things would turn out differently, but I'm glad they went the way they did, and I'm glad you've been a part of the picture.

5) I don't think you ever could have imagined how much I would miss you. And I always will.

6) I don't understand how you can be so incredibly mean to people you're supposed to love. I just don't get it. I hope one day I can understand where it comes from and why you think it's OK to be so hurtful.

7) When we broke up I was completely devastated. I acted like I didn't care, but I had too much pride to show how I really felt. I think you knew this...but I'll never be sure.

8) You were the best first kiss I have ever had. You brought out a gutsy-ness in me that no one else has.

9) Thank you for not taking advantage of a silly 18 year old girl when I gave you every opportunity to do so.

10) It really hurt my feelings when you talked about me behind my back. It screwed things up for me really badly, which I know you didn't intend, but still. Very uncool.

11) I feel bad for ignoring you that time you came to visit me because I was drooling all over a boy. That was really crappy of me.

12) Telling a first date that the temple makes you feel "all tingly" is really, really creepy. I wouldn't recommend it in the future.

13) I'm sorry for breaking up with you the way I did. I was young and stupid and didn't know what I was doing. It still bothers me that I hurt you by not being honest and clear about my feelings.

14) You are one of the most insightful, self-aware women I've ever known. I look up to you in so many ways.

15) Every time I hear a Grateful Dead song or drive through an ice storm it reminds me of you. You were there for me at such an important juncture in my life and you'll never know how much you helped me just by being there to talk to and play guitar with.